As a poker player, you certainly love to ponder what the likely outcome of a specific situation is. There is no shame in that and it’s just the nature of what you do. Have you ever wondered, though, what the chances of finding love are? As it turns out, they aren’t so good after all, especially if you trust Oxbridge mathematician Rachel Riley, who just like you, has decided to trust numbers over speculation. Yet, there is hope and it’s important to know what you should do to secure the affection of another person.
Chances of Finding Love Are Depressing: Can You Beat Them?
What Riley has found out is adults today don’t stand much of a chance of finding love. Well, at least not at first blush. In fact, the odds are equal to drawing a “Flush” or a “Full House” in a game of poker, i.e. 1:550 on average. This should apply to you if you are a resident of the United Kingdom, as Riley’s study focuses on the 22 million adults in the country.
Yet, you can extrapolate the lessons taught by her research and apply it to your personal quest for love. And what lessons those are! Let’s start with compatibility.
Compatibility & Love
So, what is compatibility? Put in dating science terms, it’s whether you would be open to consider dating someone and being in a committed relationship with them. Compatibility, according to Riley’s study, means an age difference no greater than 12 years. So, if you are 35, you would probably be okay to date someone who is in their 20s or early 40s.
This though takes a toll on the number of suitable partners, as the 22 million adults suddenly have become fewer. The United Kingdom is also a better example, as the population density and transport is fairly better than the United States where some people live at great distances from each other, so your odds of meeting a compatible partner increase – somewhat.
The Traits that Define Us
We humans are a picky lot and as much as we would like to say that we look deeper, our ability to bond with others is very much contingent on what we find attractive in our partners. Intelligence, humor, kindness and personal success are just some of the defining factors, and when put outside of context, they strike as awful oversimplification.
Yet, these things define our relationships. Our egos often get in the way, but so do our preferences in music and whether we are a cat or a dog person. Morality and general outlook on life are also important. Some prioritize their relationships whereas other partners focus on their careers. All of this defines us, and for better or for worse, you will be influenced by those in your choice of a partner.
Looks Do Matter
You would say that looks don’t matter as much and perhaps that is true, but the majority of people need to be physically attracted to their partners as well. While you could argue that it’s of not such importance to you, this could be for a number of reasons, including that you have grown tired of looking for a suitable partner.
So, someone who is more attractive than you, might still fall in love with you, if they have been disappointed too many times. According to one study, 18% of the people we find attractive will find us attractive as well, which is a good number overall.
How Can You Improve Your Odds of Finding Love
Now that you know that finding love takes time, you will probably need to disenchant yourself with the notion of “true love”. We are such complex beings and it is in our nature to yearn to be loved. Yet, the idea of incinerating love is romanticized. You can love your partner and they would certainly mean the world to you, but most relationships are build slowly and gradually, until it happens and you are inseparable.
So, can you in fact boost your 1:550 odds of finding love? As it turns out you can. Some people are tireless in their pursuit – they visit social events they think might interest suitable partners. That’s great because, as it turns out, you will need to be meeting more of the right people to really improve your odds of finding love.
For instance most work spaces have us speak with 15 different people on average, which means another 14% chance of finding someone whom we may fall in love with, based on Riley’s projections. But even if you are not so keen on someone, you can still befriend them and meet their friends. That’s another 16% percent up there to try and meet a suitable partner.
Of course, there are those who work from home, which could make finding true love a little more of a challenge. Finding your special someone will then to be pursued outside of your house. Some argue that you won’t find your love in a bar, although you could still try.
Yet, going out alone seems to be more common and fun than you think. Supposedly, there will be plenty of people who have also decided to go it solo.
Dating Online: Does It Really Work?
And then there is online dating – a business that is booming. Now, you may be a little sceptical to whether you will get that “Full House” with the first draw, but some dating services have been proven to be quite successful. According to Riley, every new step you take that is in line with your goal will add a 13% likelihood of meeting your perfect someone.
Dating online and attending events is always the surefire way to start at least going out on dates. Understandably, the pool of suitable partners may also shrink depending on the place you live in and the population. Should you move and change your city for the sake of love? Who knows? After all, poker professionals travel the world in pursuit of what they love, so keep in mind that while something that you desire may be in reach – it could take efforts on your part.